Growing up in a Catholic School I learned the sacrament of confession. I never got to experience the mysterious room where you tell your deepest, darkest secrets but as I sat in the church pew I imagined all the things my friends were saying: I stole my friend’s eraser, I told my mom a lie, I three way called my friends and tricked her to say bad things. The last one definitely happened, but I doubt anyone confessed to that!
Instead we live in silence through “I am fine.”
As I have grown older, confession has become more complicated. We hide behind a smile, a computer screen, a job, a “put together” life all while our world is falling apart.
When I kept silent,
my bones wasted away
through my groaning all day long.
Psalm 32:3
“I am fine.” The three words that destroy relationships. Each time we choose these words we are pushing away others who care. We are choosing to suffer alone. We are forcing others to watch us break until they eventually stop watching.
While others leave, we are slowly wasting away. Most often our silence is internal and reflects the silent treatment we are giving Christ as well.
From shame to release.
If you have ever observed someone leaving a confessional, you will notice the new posture they carry as they leave. They no longer carry the slump of shame, but an upright position of “new.”
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
1 John 1:9
The need for a confession can be so simple; a small, innocent mistake yet so difficult to release.
I have a confession. In my book Hope (Amidst the Stories I Told Myself) I made a mistake. I misspoke. I made a biblical claim that is not accurate. When pointed out by a friend I immediately saw the mistake that it was. I of course thanked her, called my editor, and made the change.
Nope. I did not do that. Instead I sulked and pretended it wasn’t there. I carried a tiny secret of the mistake, which of course led me to continue to wonder who “else noticed it?” With this simple mistake that could be easily corrected I carried around shame.
As I would sit in the pews at my elementary Catholic school waiting for my classmates to finish their confessions, I often wondered what the priest would look like through the screen and what he would say to a horrific confession such as theft (gasp!).
19 My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, 20 because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.
James 1:19-20
Catholic priests have mastered the art of “quick to listen and slow to speak.” Perhaps this is part of what makes the art of confession to a priest so powerful. Imagine the power we would carry when we too take the advice of James. To truly listen to other’s, even criticism, ooooo I feel a part 2 coming next week.
Your secret’s safe with me.
How many times have you been burned by that remark? Probably enough that you have learned exactly who you can trust with your secrets.
How many times have you experienced “church hurt” because your secret or prayer request or even confession then became the church gossip? Again probably enough to not want to share.
16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.
James 5:16
Now is the time to remove the veneers covering up your imperfections, confess your sin, and change your posture. A release is coming!
