Day after day I watch my beautiful daughter work relentlessly on perfecting her turns. Recently when I walked into her room during a turn session, something took over all common sense as the floor called for me to give it a try. The voice of my dance teacher echoed in my head as I got into place, spotted in front of me, and nailed a double. In complete shock, my daughter grabbed her phone to record. Now more confident than ever, I removed the glasses from my nose and the items that had been stuffed in my hoodie pocket and attempted another. This time I slipped a little, socks may have been just one of the bad ideas for this moment. Determined to do better for video, I go again. The first turn successfully made it, but on the second revolution, ¾ of the way around, my socked foot failed me. 

The fall was hard. Barely missing the desk in her room, my head bounced off the floor. Instant pain in my neck, head, and hip as well as instant laughter that bellowed from deep within. I had not laughed that hard in a long time. I also laid there for a hot minute because falling at my age does not result in bouncing back up. 

This moment reflects my 2023 so far with pristine accuracy.

After returning from an amazing family vacation, I was turning into 2023 like I was 16 again. 

Then it hit me. My baby would be 17. It is hard to even imagine what he would look like, talk like, or act like. Would he be annoying his siblings (probably), a comedian (trying to turn even hard situations into a joke, like his momma), or an IT nerd like his dad? Would his life be normal or full of hospital stays and surgeries? 

Some days the memories are so clear. Every smell, beep, and whispers of families quickly retrieved to make it seem just like yesterday. Other days it is hard to fathom all the time that has passed and how we have even survived each minute with the knowledge he is not in it. 

Last week my youngest and I were watching The Croods and when the dad and Guy got stuck in the tar, I realized that could have been me. If you are honest with yourself, it could probably also be you. One can be in a “tar situation” either from the loss of a loved one, a friendship, a career, or even the dream once envisioned. When it is gone we can become stuck in our new reality. 

In Genesis 3 we find Adam and Eve in a “tar situation.” They were given a choice and the result of their choice led to devastation. This banishment from the Garden of Eden still affects us today. 

In the Croods the dad begins fighting their stuck situation. He is trying his hardest to get himself out. We are exactly the same. Over and over again we attempt to control the situation.

We analyze and calculate every problem like it can be solved with a simple algebraic formula.

We fill our time with busyness to overcome the void from our grief. We overeat or work out relentlessly in order to feel the control we have lost. We overspend as a desire to replace the feelings of emptiness. 

The reality is what The Croods discovered, fighting it will not result in survival, but in actuality death. Our busyness will result in exhaustion; our overeating or excessive working out will pull us away from healthy habits and relationships. Our over spending will equate to a physical bankruptcy in addition to the spiritual zero balance. We can’t do anything ourselves to fix this.

The Croods do exactly what we need to do to get “unstuck,” they get pulled out by something much bigger than themselves. 

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the multicolored animal that pulls The Croods out, doesn’t exist for us. But there is someone else who is much more powerful and who has already sent his son to die for our sins so that we do not have to remain stuck, Jesus.

Mark 10:45 For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.

Romans 6:23 For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.

I leave you with the wise words of Guy: “Don’t hide. Live.”