This week has been rough. The stock market crashed, parents across the country are homeschooling while working from home, TP is nowhere to be found, many parts of the world is “sheltering in place,” while the medical field is on the front lines of the virus having to reuse the same thin mask due to shortages.
All of this I am able to put in a different category of my brain where I both see it and hear it, but I can not let it affect me. But this week tragedy struck our community bringing on a wave of emotions.
For days I have been angry, confused, sad, and overwhelmed. It was a trigger for a lot of emotions I tend to push deep down. I could suddenly feel it all coming up.
A wave pushing me down over and over, barely able to catch a breath.
Paul and Silas in Acts 16 had been brought in front of the authorities, mobbed by a crowd, beaten, flogged, and then thrown into prison.
25 About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. 26 Suddenly there was such a violent earthquake that the foundations of the prison were shaken. At once all the prison doors flew open, and everyone’s chains came loose.
I can’t help but think how. How can they sing to God when they have been beaten with rods?
Even more close to my heart was when I recently began studying 2 Samuel and King David. I read this weeks ago, but came back again to it yesterday.
16 David pleaded with God for the child. He fasted and spent the nights lying in sackcloth[b] on the ground. 17 The elders of his household stood beside him to get him up from the ground, but he refused, and he would not eat any food with them.
18 On the seventh day the child died. David’s attendants were afraid to tell him that the child was dead, for they thought, “While the child was still living, he wouldn’t listen to us when we spoke to him. How can we now tell him the child is dead? He may do something desperate.”
19 David noticed that his attendants were whispering among themselves, and he realized the child was dead. “Is the child dead?” he asked.
“Yes,” they replied, “he is dead.”
20 Then David got up from the ground. After he had washed, put on lotions and changed his clothes, he went into the house of the Lord and worshiped.
Wait. He just lost his son. David begged God to save him and yet, he still died. How can he worship in a time like this?
While mindlessly scrolling through Instagram I see a post by a worship leader, Chris Brown. He is singing in a stairwell, acoustic, and alone. No frills. I honestly didn’t want to listen to it, too angry to worship. But these words got me:
There will be grace and mercy all around.
It won’t be long.
We will behold him.
Every tear he’ll wipe away.
We will be at home.
The war will be over.
Soon we will meet our Savior face to face.
I listened to it over and over again. I was able to catch my breath. By the third time I was no longer listening but singing. Peace was filling my soul.
Before I knew it, tears were rolling down my face as the chains of sorrow were breaking off me.
As I reflect on this current season and think back to Paul, Silas, and David’s experiences I am no longer thinking, “how can they?” but “why wouldn’t they?”
Worshiping when we feel like it is great but worshipping when we don’t brings the opportunity for change.
Worshiping when we are hopeless brings hope.
Worshipping when we are overwhelmed with depression brings peace.
Mark Batterson in his book, In A Pit With A Lion On A Snowy Day, said it best, “Circumstances you complain about become chains that imprison you. And worship is the way out. Worship reframes our problems and refocuses our lives. It helps us get through the bad days by reminding us how good God is.”
Times right now might not feel good. I have been in the valley and although I may not understand it, I stand firm in my belief that God is still good.
As we continue to navigate the uncertainties of life, will you join me in finding peace through worship? How can I be praying for you?
