When your child asks to practice riding their bike (without training wheels) this is an exciting moment, but not with our youngest. Although he was the one who asked, I had already learned from previous trials it was not going to end well. Several weeks ago he saw his fellow Kindergarten friend across the street had learned to ride her bike and he decided it was time for him to try again too. What he did not see was that she had practiced for over an hour with her daddy. Lukas wanted nothing to do with practice. He wanted to get on the bike and go.
Here is how bike riding with Lukas goes. Bike wobbles and brings fear. Fear then sends signals to his body to trigger anxiety. When the anxiety is triggered watch out because the meltdown is coming. An anxiety meltdown resembles a tantrum. There is screaming, crying, flashes between overwhelming fear and anger, and a lot of negotiations, demands, and flat out threats to quit.
This day Lukas justified his need to quit by saying, “God doesn’t want me to ride my bike!” I was startled. What six year old says something like this?
The more I thought about it, as an adult am I any different?
How many times have I justified something that was too hard as something that God wanted me to just give up on?
-Every attempt to eat better
-Every exercise regiment
-Every friendship that required more work than I was willing to give
-My dream to continue ministry with Young Life after college
-Living after losing Alex
I am no one special. But Elijah was a prophet first introduced in 1 Kings who heard from and trusted God. He stood before the King of Israel and announced a drought that would last for three years. He listened to God direct him where to flee during which God fed him through ravens (17:4) and saw the promise of an oil jar and flour jar that would not run out (17:14). Elijah even performed miracles when he brought back to life a young boy (17:17-24). Insane and worth the read. I say all this to tell you even Elijah, who was introduced showing full trust, had fear. He had just called down fire from heaven to prove to those who were following Baal who God is (1 Kings 18).
1 Kings 19 Now Ahab told Jezebel everything Elijah had done and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. 2 So Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, “May the gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them.”
3 Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, 4 while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.” 5 Then he lay down under the bush and fell asleep.
Elijah, the one who had even witnessed God in all these ways was afraid. So afraid he was ready to end it all.
I have been there. Ready to end it all. If you keep reading 1 Kings 19, God came to me in the same way as he did to Elijah, a whisper. I heard Him in the quiet whisper in a hallway at Duke Medical Center and one night on my front porch during the big life changing moments. But I can remember as far back as childhood when God was whispering to me in my small church to walk forward to accept Christ. Or on a mountaintop in Colorado as the sun was setting to make changes in my life.
I will admit to you that with Lukas I stop him when I see the fear in his face. I stop him before the triggers of anxiety turn into a meltdown. Dealing with his meltdown is a lot.
But my husband pushes Lukas to overcome. On this day Brandon had an incredible patience. He stayed right with Lukas through it. Brandon listened to the rants and threats, just quietly reminding him to “try again.”
Just like Brandon, God listened to me rant, make threats, and throw tantrums over my anguish of loss. Just like Lukas, I was not kind. But God stayed right by my side whispering for me to “try.”
You see Brandon could push Lukas because he knew the outcome. He knew Lukas was safe in the grass and with him right by his side. He also knew by sticking with it, Lukas would be able to overcome his fear and enjoy the ride.
Just because it’s hard doesn’t mean God wants you to stop. Instead you need to listen for the whisper and trust.
How do we do this? If we read 1 Kings 19 you will see two key things Elijah did:
- Nourishment
He ate and drank (19:6). When we are struggling during difficult seasons we can often teter between not eating at all or over consuming junk. I am guilty of both. It is when I am eating well (healthy and nourished foods) that I am able to think the best. I am more aware of the world around me and I feel able to move when called to.
- Rest
and then lay down again (19:6). When I am at my worst, my mind takes over my ability to sleep. One thought leads to another and another and a whirlwind of “what if’s” spins me into a tornado that takes down anything in its path. The lack of sleep turns me into a daytime zombie only moving through the motions until another sleepless night. When we allow ourselves to reach this point we are not able to hear God.
After Elijah was nourished and rested he heard from God in the whisper and he trusted God to take the next step to overcome his fear.
What fear is holding you back? What steps can you take to focus on the whisper?
