“Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it.” Jesus said this to Cain in Genesis 4:6-7
Simple enough. Do what is right and good things will happen to you. Love and you will be loved.
Maybe it is just me, but I have lived my whole life with the motto of be good and good things will happen to you. This past weekend as I listened to our pastor tell his story of a time he and his wife struggled, tears streamed down my face as it was a struggle I was all too familiar with. Medicines and machines I had never heard of surrounding my child with small chances of survival whispering with every setback. He too wrote Jeremiah 29:11 on a piece of paper and taped it to the ICU bed speaking hope into the room. He too was in ministry and had done “everything right.”
The difference is his baby lived and I am left with the question of “why me?”
I questioned sharing this as I already had something else written for this week, but I was reminded that He did answer my prayer.
If you have been following me for a while, then you can probably retell this story but here is the significance, even after 16 years when I am sitting in a church service asking God “why?” He reminds me of this same story. I feel an overwhelming need to remind you today of your story of Promise.
God makes promises and unlike man, He keeps them.
As my son was being rushed to yet another OR for surgery, I was running to a lonely hallway. I barely made it, before falling to my knees. With tears streaming down my face, I repeatedly prayed, “Jesus. Jesus.” Then out loud I said, “Heal my son. But I want your will, not my own.” Looking back it is silly I said that, considering who else’s will would it be, but I needed to outloud remind myself that He knows better than me. In that very same moment, I heard an answer. I can’t tell you if it was audible but it was clear.
“No. But you will be ok.” This was my promise from Him. At this moment I should have cried out in agony over this answer. I should have refused to listen. But neither of those things occurred because with the words spoken came a peace beyond all understanding. I was completely surrounded by this peace so much so that I wiped my tears, got off the floor, and waited for my son to get out of the OR. I knew, each day was a gift of extra time.
Today I want to remind you sin is always crouching at our door waiting for the moment we allow our troubles to wreak havoc on our lives. When we allow Satan to use the difficult times in our lives to propel us on a downward spiral, he will do it.
There are times when I still feel completely wrecked by the loss of my son. Other times I am just angry. God always reminds me of the promise He made me, the peace I felt in that moment, and the reflection that I am indeed ok.
3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. 1 Corinthians 1:3-4
May you too be able to embrace the pain and focus on the promise. You too, are going to be ok.
